They’ll never know… What millennials might be missing out on

by Mahek Khetani|arts and entertainment editor

If there’s anything we love as a generation, it’s making fun of ourselves. That being said, your inner 90s kid is about to be revived, see if you remember these fossils that mom and dad are always raving about.

We asked a student to address an envelope for us and here's what we got back.  Impressive, yes?
We asked a student to address an envelope for us and here’s what we got back. Impressive, yes?

Kodak cameras- Those yellow babies were in the hands of every tourist. you couldn’t zoom in, you couldn’t set it on night mode and worst of all, Valencia wasn’t an option for enhancement. You just looked through the lens, turned the dial (about 17 times) then click and hope for the best. Then once you’ve printed the pics, the clunky box goes in the trash only to be replaced with another. Fickle, we know.

Paul McCartney- If you’re an avid twitter user, you know that Mr.McCartney’s upcoming collab with Kanye West is deeming him as “an awesome newcomer who’s gonna go big because of Kanye.” Now it’s no one’s fault if they don’t know who the Beatles are but do you really think Kanye would team up with a newcomer? named Paul? But we understand, if in the future, a teen doesn’t know who Lady Gaga is, we may just cry ourselves to sleep listening to ARTPOP.

Gameboys- If the Kodak sounded too clunky, just hold one of these badboys. The screens had the clarity of Iggy Azalea’s freestyling and the option of jump and run. And you were most likely limited to Pokemon and Mario. But on the plus side, if you dropped it down a concrete flight of stairs, it’s still good as new. (We speak from experience.)

Office phones/fax machines- Those chunky gray things collecting dust in your garage, yup they still exist. But truly we don’t know why? what is a fax. Why can’t you just email it? Why is there a phone, does it even make a call? Why do I have to dial 9 first? And most importantly, of all the colors, why ash gray?

Cursive- We can’t even comprehend the widespread panic that occurs during the PSAT pledge, We haven’t seen that much fear in a teenager’s eye since Debbie Cakes were removed from the lunch lines. In all seriousness though, who cares if you can loop an L in a fancy way? We can guarantee you that the person who types 60 words a minute is gonna get a job faster than Mr.Calligraphist (unless he actually wants to be a calligraphist, then good luck).

Mailing an envelope-  Snail mail isn’t really a thing to us to anymore, but as graduation approaches, we have to lick envelopes left and right. That being said, it’s a little important to know where the addresses go so colleges aren’t completely horrified with our generation. I mean it could be worse, at least the millennials try to learn rather than complaining that the internet is broken…

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