by Stephan Stryker Mielnik

 

 

                I think I see somebody I knew.

I know I see nobody I know.

 

Looking below me, the eyeliner running down

             Empty glass in my hand

     All Doubts.

 

I stare at a reflection

 

I Look at an empty face

  I stare at a mangled body

      An occupied body 

 

           Nobody.

 

Laying Lifeless I think and wonder

      How I thought if I dragged friends home to play pretend 

           “Good lord maybe I wouldn’t feel so alone”

 

          Feeling of loneliness in a room full of people

Wasting time for that Doesn’t make sense 

 

           Nothing but Shaky Breath in a room full of air

 

                                    What a Shame

 

               “Don’t play dumb, boy, let me learn you better”

 

For just an hour, throwing a stoplight or two

                 Pretending works for a nobody to be somebody 

 

“Boy’s a Devil’s Advocate, give no pity”

“Don’t look at that charming toy and think that’s somebody”

 

I hide pain behind a pretty face

I hide thoughts behind a pretty body 

 

         Midnight morning with no one home

     2 am with a cup in my hand

A pretty girl who I pretend understands

 

Red red red

         That color of lust

 

Disgust 

 

      Nothing but disgust

 

Everywhere all over.     dark and bust.

 

               Root beer float, no alcohol involved how I wish there was no sickness

 

                               Somebody

 

“When words hold no meaning that’s your problem

     

          Not mine”

 

You don’t know if someone’s a nobody until they were a somebody else 

         Staring at a bathroom mirror at the after party

 

There is nobody 

Yet I still pretend I see somebody 

 

                      Who’s the real fool here, you or me?